HOLY CRAP!

I ran desperately into the garage knowing I didn't have much time. I needed to find anything I could to protect me. I saw a pair of old gardening gloves, the kind you could try to cut with a steak knife to no avail, but even those wouldn't be enough. I needed to find more: a surgical mask, a bulletproof vest, a hazmat suit. It didn't matter what I put on, I was going to be naked to what was to happen next.

I put on the gloves and went back in the house. My heart was racing, my hands were shaking inside their thick leather protectors. I wanted to cover me eyes but knew that I needed both if I was going to be able to complete my task. I walked hesitantly, not knowing exactly what to do, but when all was said and done, I think I managed not to put her diaper on backwards.
That's right kids, I changed my first diaper. I am 24 years old. I did seriously wear those gardening gloves. Not only am I scared to death of other people's poop (even if it is from a very cute neice), but I despise touching wet naps or baby wipes. I don't know what it is, maybe some traumatizing wet nap experience in my childhood that is long since repressed, but that alcohol smell and wet napkin feel just make me gag.

I was only babysitting for 4 hours and thought...."ok there is a good chance I won't have to change her. Even if she poops near the end of my stay I could just bear it for a little while until I quickly escaped leaving my father with the dirty diaper." 15 minutes after I was left alone, that girl crapped her pants like nothing I have ever seen. I had to setup an elaborate system of pullies to be able to lift the (almost) bursting container of poop. I cleaned her (I think) and put the new diaper on (possibly backwards). I then called my wife to receive accolades for the amazing accomplishment that I had just achieved. Needless to say, she was very impressed.